if..If and IF...

Humans had built in wings..swear i'll fly away and come back when shit ends or perhaps fly to a land where I don't know who I am or who I was. A fresh start where nothing in the past matters and the current phase in life is not to known to me at all. Day by day, I'm getting more and more tired than how the past few months has been. I wonder what yet again, what have I done or committed in the past to deserve this. It's draining me to a point where I don't know what to do anymore. I have gone back to the way I was and though I try, I can't fight it any longer. I wonder how long is this gonna last. Everything at all seem to get me down and I find myself struggling to stay awake, to stay less negative since positivity has left my life a long time ago. Each day goes by and I feel like a loser. It sounds shitty but it's true. I can't concentrate at work hence here I am...after not writing for ages.... I'm sick...of it all....pfftt