the safest place, a hiding place
stop the thoughts and erase rough times
take me for a ride down memory lane
but never once is it ever the ugly lane
everything's clear and pretty
as crystal blue meth
a swim down under
a dive way below where it all disappears
never a tear, never any fear
smiles all over that last forever

the uncertainty of it all is killing me
can i wake up to find out that everythin's finally alrite
when the strive is finally over would it be worth the while
or will i have to lay down and cry
i don't wanna lose this battle now that i've come this far
but it sucks counting the days which seem to pass by slower than usual
if i could i'd run away to a secret hiding place
and have someone hold me till i can wake up to realise it's over and done with

don't get mad when i'm quiet please for i might be thinking to myself about how thankful i am that you're here
or maybe i'm worrying bout what lies ahead......

don't get mad when i'm scared please cause maybe i've been through too many wars at home and you've been my safe haven all along but maybe i just never told you so.......

where r u when i need you most?
u speak but never seem to listen
u look but see way beyond me and not what i'm trying to show you
now how is that even fair?

why's life never fair everywhere i go
nothing's change since 1985
if i changed the way i looked and everything about me
will i finally be seen for who i am
but what is the point of that if i can stay the way i am?
it hurts being left behind all the time
feels like the harder i try, the harder i fall
am i too slow to understand that i'm just never good enough
or maybe the rest of the world has learnt that from daddy

nothing seems to work out right
how much more must i do
to finally get to where i wanna be
my head hurts and my eyes are all cried out
cause what i want was too near and yet too far now

never needed or will ever need reminders of what i never had or will never ever have
so why don't you keep your thoughts and not share with me about the absolute luck you have of all that you have and something that money can't buy
maybe you could start by stop being so insensitive and see that all I ever do is try to care
but instead you smash and tear my heart into a million pieces with the things you say

arrrggghhhh

it's frustrating that I can't tell you coz maybe you won't even understand
thought u did know me well enough but guess you don't at all
but it's not fair cause it only tells me that you just hear but you don't listen as I speak
why is that so?
save those stuff that hurt for the rest who have them too
share stories of those kind with everyone but me
it hurts deep down and how long will I have to hide it
I could try to erase it and block it of but till when must I......